|
|
|
January 10th, 2006
02:37 am
Its ready to lurk and ADD. Friends only. SO if you dont have LJ sorry you might be bored late at night cause you cant read my LJ.
Goodbye Little_furies. 2005 was nice.
|
January 6th, 2006
02:03 am - NEW LJ.
I got a new live journal.
its 2006. i have become a different person over the past few months and the same lj just doesnt seem right.
i will add you if you want just let me know cause its gonna be friends only.
Current Music: fiona apple
|
January 1st, 2006
02:18 am
2005!
January:
First trip to Lima, OH to visit Hit the Lights and got stranded cause of an ice storm.
Febraury:
Met my brother, Mike Tischer.
Hit the Lights stayed with me a week in Chicago.
March:
Met one of my closest friends, Marty.
Stop hating eachother and became friends with Liz.
Took a bus 11 hours each way to Columbus, OH for one night to see Hit the Lights.
Met Lindsey.
Met the Goodwill and there guitarist, Brian.
April:
Went to Lima, OH again for Hit the Lights CD release show.
Met Nick Testa.
Got married to my husband, Marc.
Met Stacy and continue to stay close with my Joey.
Hit the Lights came to Chicago for few days.
Got to spend alot of time with my girls Lindsey and Kelly.
Spent alot of time with my best friend, Brian Martinez.
....and smoked pot for the first time.
May:
Moved out of Hell... and
...Moved in with Satan.
June:
Fell so hard for Scot.
Went to Dayton, OH and stayed with Nick Testa for a few days.
Found the Batman mask.
Met Casey and got to party with Hit the Lights.
July:
1 week, 3 bands (Hit the Lights, Time and Distance, and Scenes from a Movie) all stayed at my apartment.
Met Squared and all the Time and Distance Boys.
Met the Scenes from a Movie boys...
and especially this one... JON.
(*ps- Got my heart SHATTERED by this one... I mean SHATTERED.)
Became actual friends with Derrick.
Tour with Perfect Endings and met my then best friend, Mike Magnetico.
Met Anthony of the Drama Summer.
Spent a week in Chicago with Perfect Endings.
After hurting Scot more than I have ever hurt anyone, he forgave me.... (which honestly he never should have done.)
August:
(*no pics. I know it's not like me to have pics... but I spent this month getting over 2 heart breaks and gained about 15 pounds. I don't really want to see pics of me from this month.)
September:
Drove to Grand Rapids with Satan to pick up Derrick.
Derrick stayed with me for a week in Chicago.
Hit the Lights played the metro and Lindsey stayed with me for basically the whole month.
Time and Distance stayed with me for 2 nights and I got to know the real Greg not "the greg" I heard about from Satan.
Got to finally meet Kate.
October:
EL RANCHITO!!!!!!!
Mica and my boys.
Marty, Me, and Mica.
Brian and me.
I met Jason last month... he means everything to me. I love this kid so much. Meeting him was one of the biggest blessings this year.
Happy Halloween.
Got new roommates and last night I got drunk cause of that bottle of Jager... this is Mae.
... and the infamous Mike Kish.
November:
WENT TO NEW YORK!!!
Absolutely fell in love with this city. I never wanted to leave.
Stayed with Mike in Jersey City. He was the main reason I went.... and miss him more than he will ever want to accept.
Met Mike's cats... who are the only animals in this world I like.
Sal... my everything... us in Long Island, NY. I got to me Yes Virginia (now Permenant Me) that night as well.
Panda and me.
Me, Justin, and Sal. I wish I never had to leave these kids.
Became so much closer with Geoff in Every Bridge Burned at my first sleepover with them in Chicago.
Thanksgiving.
December:
Went to Orlando, FL.... me and Daddy at Universal Studios.
Met Chasing Victory and had sleepovers with them at my condo. (My roommate is the merch guy. He is in the middle.)
Chasing Victory and Transition stayed with me for 4 days in Chicago.
(Me, Jeremy, and Chris of Chasing Victory)
The Transition boys.
Met Sullivan. My roommate Mike and Brooks *sigh* from Sullivan.
Another fun sleepover with Every Bridge Burned.
Hit the Lights and Rocket Summer Sleepover at my place.
Mended all things with Gina at the Hit the Lights show in Milwaukee.
Stayed friends with JC and this night I learned to love him as a friend more than I ever thought I would.
Merry Christmas.
I LOVE MY LIFE. I couldn't have asked for a better year.
|
December 31st, 2005
02:17 am - Just maybe you need this
I have the worst pit in my stomach tonight and don't know why.
I lost 4 pounds this week. 14 to go. Clothes fit better and I feel so great. I am making the treadmill at 4MPH at a 4 incline my best friend an hour a day... I give the stairclimber and weight machines plenty of love too.
I went out with Jon tonight and had such a great time... even though I smashed his cookies, my pants got soaked, and I wore a jacket and froze me ass off. We went to Pick Me Up... had dinner and talked for hours.
I MISS SAL SOOOOOOO MUCH. My life isn't complete without him here in Chicago. We talk daily now and I love that cause I hate not hearing his voice everyday. He sends me the most amazing text messages about how beautiful and perfect I am... and we decided we are getting married one day when I move to NY.
Brian Martinez and me talked for a little but tonight. He actually made me cry in a good and bad way. We have both changed so drastically in the past few months so we are going to have dinner on Thursday night to see if we can become friends again and accept the other person who they have become. I told him I missed him and meant it. I miss all the nights of sitting through zombie movies just to see my daddy and him smile. I miss Brian sending me texts that say "R.B.F!!!!!!!" and going to Cub foods to get him some vanilla ice cream and root beer. I miss all those nights just driving in his car and taking the dumbest photos late at night with our sunglasses on. I will stop cause I could do this all night long....
I HATE when someone is holding there phone in there hand and doesn't text me back.
New Year's Eve equals me serving Stir Fry for 8 hours and told I would make at least $200.00.
I deleted Matt (Forecast) and Kyle from my life tonight. I feel like our friendships are so one-sided. Matt can tell me how much he loves talking to me and how much he wants to hang out with me but never talks to me anymore and totally lead me on. Kyle tells me how amazing, beautiful, and wonderful I am all the time and how he doesn't talk to anyone cause he's so depressed yet I know that's a lie... and everytime we make plans to hang out "something" always happens. I think they are both amazing people with such big hearts and they honestly mean well... but just aren't the kind of friends I want in my life.
I love the Honorary Title.
I am so happy I am making smart decisions. I am glad I don't act irrational anymore and I think before I say hurtful things that I won't mean once I calm down. My life has become so healthy mentally and physically. I see so much everyday. I live a lifestyle very few get to experience. I get to wake up everyday in the beautiful city of chicago. I have the most loyal friends.... and yes once again...
I LOVE MY LIFE.
I've grown sick
I've gotten older
I finally have an audience to ignore
I can yell all I want
But you still can't hear me.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/content.gif) content
Current Music: new found glory
|
December 30th, 2005
02:21 am - stopping we's and starting i's
I have worked everyday this week... I seriously can't wait for next wednesday cause it will be my first day of not smelling stir-fry in almost 3 weeks.
Jon and me are going on an official date tomorrow. I have spent at least an hour on the phone with him everynight for like a week now and he totally puts up with me eating fudge pops, mopping my kitchen floor, and yelling all while I am on the phone with him.
Mica and me went to see Jason's band play at the Beat Kitchen last night and she got kicked out for trying to use a fake AFTER she showed them her real one. It was hilarious. I saw her new apartment and it is so beautiful... and I got to see Jason FINALLY after like 2 months. I love him so much. Just getting like 3 huge hugs from him last night was amazing. I didn't even want to let him go as he was leaving. I remember in September/October he was over almost everynight and I really miss that.
I have no drama in my life right now.
.... I know my entries on here have been kinda boring but honestly I am so content and happy with my life right now I don't know what to say except.... FINALLY.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/happy.gif) happy
Current Music: new fiona apple album
|
December 27th, 2005
06:39 pm - (it's better than silence, give me one good reason)
I need to start using last names on here cause too many lurkers read this and think it's about them and leave insane comments.
Baby, lay your head on my lap one more time...tell me you belong to me.
Matt's band is playing at the Metro tonight and I was suppose to go and photograph but for some reason I think it would be too awkward so I am gonna avoid it and spend all night at the gym.
I am addicted to Fiona Apple, The Honorary Title, Amber Pacific, and this song by Cartel called, "If I fail." If you haven't heard any of them STOP reading this and go check them out... cause they are more interesting than me anyways.
I hate the smell of Stir-Fry. I have to take like 3 showers a day just to get the scent off me and I work everyday and it just keeps lingering back.
I LOVE MARISSA JADE. ... she is one of the most amazing and beautiful girls I have ever met. THANK YOU SO MUCH BABE FOR THE CHRISTMAS PACKAGE.
I woke up today and felt beautiful. I never thought eating better and exercising could make such a positive change in my life mentally and physically.
Sorry I am not that interesting today...
However I am completely SMITTEN by a boy.
I would honestly love you now but I would lovingly let you down.
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: fiona apple
|
December 26th, 2005
10:32 pm - ......i could put my trust in giving up the heart
I just worked a 12 hour double at my work and made 170.00$ which I am WAY excited about cause I need to save money for California and my new digital camera I want.
My daddy called me yesterday and I was so freaked out when I heard his ring tone I cried and didn't answer. I seriously had a panic attack. I ran to my room and blasted the only song that ever makes me calm down, "Lullaby" by Pedro the Lion.
I called him back and went to Christmas. I just sat there all night very quiet. Didn't really eat at all, said thank you for the presents, and played on my laptop until it was time to leave.
It didn't even feel like Christmas at all. ... but at least my daddy called. Whether he did it out of obligation or because he actually wanted me there... I still got to give him his book. Which in all honesty he didn't seem to thrilled about.
Thank God I had Will and Jon texting/aiming me all day to make it through.
I got about 35 phone calls and texts wishing me a Merry Christmas too from Kyle (Livonia), the Transition boys, Jamie, and so many others. It totally made my day that so many people care about me.
I started my diet. Day 3 of no Coffee, Dr.Pepper/Soda, Doritos, and candy.
Will totally emailed this photo to me and I LOVE IT ....
This is my humidifier and it makes me sleep SOOOOO much better.
... and this is me and Daddy on Christmas holding up the book I made him...
Current Mood: content
Current Music: cartel
|
December 25th, 2005
12:54 am - We'd have our own subway car in the middle of the night.......
I have NEVER felt so alone before in my life.
I try and try and try to be the best daughter and the best friend I can... yet somehow I ALWAYS fail.
It's 12:57am on Christmas day and my daddy hasn't returned my calls in weeks. So it looks like I will be spending Christmas alone for a reason I don't even know and he won't tell me. I spent the past week on his present too and in making it I realized this.. No matter where I live, what job I take, or where ever my life ends up I would be nothing without his love and support. It brings me to tears that he makes me feel like I am not even good enough to return my phone calls ON CHRISTMAS.
I feel like the closer I get to people the farther it pushes them away. My closest friends and me are always getting upset with eachother and never make time to see eachother or even talk.... but I feel like "people I know", not really I call friends, I talk to daily. I don't understand the role of friendship and what people mean to me these days cause I feel like everyone means more to me than I mean to them.
Lindsey and me haven't been the same since she left... and it sucks so much... but trust has been broken on both sides and it's the hardest thing to get over.
I miss BRIAN (NEW YORK) more than he could ever know... I hope one day he will take the time to listen why I stopped talking to him.... I deleted him right now out of my life for a reason. Soon babe, soon.
I texted Mike tonight... I didn't expect a response but I thought, "Hey it's christmas..." but I should stop thinking that cause apparently Christmas and the holidays don't mean to anyone what I was raised to believe they mean.
This post could be 15793 pages if I name each friend and all that I am going through with them... but what's the point. I have learned more about life and myself in 2005. I saw so many people come and go yet I have become so close with people I never thought I would.
***********************
On a lighter note....
Mike Tischer is amazing. When I told him about all of this he said, "I was very depressed all day as well, for an unknown reason, I think that the times I get down are when you are down..." I told him it must be the brother/sister connection and he says, "One soul. One love." ... and invited me to his father's for Christmas tomorrow. Which meant SO much to me.
Omar sent me a text that read, "Happy Christmas you cunt. Miss you."... and it totally made me smile.
Lately J.C. has been there for me and listened to me when I thought no one cared anymore. It's weird how one year ago I was in Kenosha shooting at his father's studio for my View Camera class and how in love with him I thought I was... and now I think we both look back and kinda laugh at the thought of us ever dating. I am glad time heals everything.
ps- I am still STILL LOVING the honorary title.
As I fall out of love, this wasn't supposed to happen...not according to you
Please don't allow your voice to fade
Don't fall so weak to fault or blame
To give yourself reason for an end
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/sad.gif) sad
Current Music: the honorary title
|
December 24th, 2005
02:16 am - .......Reveal evidence that you are easily broken
I went to my friend Dave's house tonight for a party... and realizes he lives like 1.3 miles from me.
Mica and Cynthia went with me. Within' the first 10 minutes of being there we probably met like 6 guys who kept talking to us. I got my ass slapped alot which wasn't fun at all.
I LOVE MICA.
4 beers and 3 hours later I left cause my eyes hurt from all the cigarette smoke and there were way to many people there.
I talked to my friend Jon, from Downer's Grove, for an hour and a half and I must say I think he's totally amazing.
I feel asleep to Mica in my bed.
I had a great night.
.... and I tried to put red streaks in my hair and they turned purple....
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/angry.gif) annoyed
Current Music: cursive
|
December 23rd, 2005
01:55 am - .........Please, God, let's not resort to mini-mall parking spaces
I went to Pick me Up Tonight with Lucasz, Nadine, and J.P. and it was amazing. We spent like 5 hours just talking over coffee.
The beautiful, Liz Jeske was there and it made me smile soooo much cause she's amazing. She actually sent me snowmen peeps for Christmas. I laughed so hard and she one of the only reasons I am smiling at all this holiday season cause that gift was so thoughtful.
My mocha soy latte looked amazing.
Lucasz is amazing. I have been friends with him over 3 years now and no matter where are lives take us it seems like we can always come back together and talk like no time has passed.
....and I have no clue why I don't have pics with Nadine or J.P... BUT I am making myself make alot more time for them so I will get some soon.
I got home at 1am and talked to Derrick for about 3 hours and it was one of the best covnersations I have ever had with him. I am glad that we are still friends after our "slight" drama.
ps- I LOVE THE HONORARY TITLE.
Current Mood: content
Current Music: the honorary title
|
December 21st, 2005
02:21 am - .......forgive me Jesus this time i cry
I was having the worst night cause of many different reasons tonight and this just totally cheered me up... I LOVE SAL. I wish I was in Long Island with him right now... or just move to NY already.
I LOVE MY FRIENDS.
Brittni might be the sweetest girl alive... I got this email tonight...
"i'm here for ya girl if ya need anything. stay strong and just know that somewhere there IS a great guy for you and he will adore you and take care of you.
i just wish he would find you now sweetheart <3
God Bless and I'll say a prayer for ya.
I wish Gonca didn't live so far as well.
I wish Mike would stop his "ignoring" me phase. I emailed, called, and texted... I don't even get upset anymore cause its been 2 years and this happens all the time. I was gonna email him again tonight and rant but he reads this. So this is all the effort I am gonna put into it.
"Honestly, I didn't notice it until you told me. Now i feel like a dick again. Kind of a running theme here. I'm sorry." I am still confused.
Kyle and me were suppose to hang out tonight but of course something happened and we didn't. I am not blaming him at all but it's always something that prevents us from seeing eachother... and tonight his car wouldn't start.
I actually almost cried over myspace tonight. Yes, I know I am pathetic. ... and it's worse when it's Top 8 bullshit.
My daddy hasn't talked to me in about 2 weeks now. I am actually getting use to him getting upset over nothing, ignoring me and my calls, not tell me why he's mad, then just call me out no where after a few weeks and think it's all ok. This time it's not gonna be ok.
I've sunken in the quicksands of love and I don't want you to rescue me
Screw what my supposed friends think....It's obvious they reek of jealousy
ps- I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
I love the spill canvas
pps- I got bangs.... like?
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/sleepy.gif) tired
Current Music: the spill canvas
|
December 20th, 2005
12:52 am - ........ Cause I'm feeling like I might need to be near you.......
I read stuff like this and smile...
Notyourtragedy: Your lj sounds like your life is kicking some ass! (... because my life really does kick ass.)
I starting talking to Kyle again last night... we agreed to hang out this week, but I told him he can never stop talking to me again and he agreed.
When I was trying to tell Geoff a story last night he said that he couldn't remember what boy I was referring too and got a little upset and told him to pay attention and he said, "Too many names.....another guy professes his love for you every week." ... and it made me laugh a little.
Work tonight was horrible. I almost burst into tears and quit my job. I need to do something else than waitress when I am not on tour... I just wish I decided this before the time of year when no place hires.
I met a boy a little over a week ago and I haven't mentioned him once on here for many reasons. My good friends know way to much about it. It's the most confusing thing ever... and I know he would hate to read about it all over LJ.... so for the first time I swallowed my pride and I am keeping this between me and him.
I went on Liz's LJ and she has some funny photos of me when we were with Hit the Lights at Melissa's.... and I am really glad Paul left his camo hoodie at my house....
Me, my corona, and melissa.
I hate J.C. and Nick for pinning me down and trying to color my teeth, coloring my ears, and making me look like a cat.
Dave stole this couch from me.
They put Cheerios in my corona.
ps- to all my lurkers, fans, and enemies... thanks for being this obsessed with my life to look at this every day and leave anonymous comments about how much you hate me. I would hate me too cause I live a better life than you and it shows by how jealousy is causing so much hatred in your life.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/confused.gif) confused
Current Music: jacks mannequin
|
December 17th, 2005
05:10 pm - ............At that age when everything is seemingly life or death
I just got home.... and it feels amazing. From going to New York, to Orlando, to bands in and out of town at my apartment for a week... I am kinda glad I am waitressing for the next 2 weeks straight. I need to take care of my body now and get back into "normal" life as boring as it can be at times.
Last night I went to Milwaukee with Hit the Lights. Seeing Jc, Liz, Melissa, Mike Tischer, and Cooper was AMAZING.
I got to be merch girl again which wasn't that bad cause the Rave has a sweet spot for photographers by the stage to take photos at so it was easy to run back and forth.
The second I saw Mike Tischer I totally ran at him and wrapped my arms around him and told him I love him. He broke his collarbone snow boarding and still went to the show to see me... just another reason why I LOVE him so much.
I got to see Cooper which was nice cause I haven't saw him since like February.
I ate the best pizza at pizza shuttle with everyone.
We went to Melissa's house to party after the show. I got to meet her boyfriend T.J. (aka- turkey jiblets) and thought he was one of the funniest guys I have ever met.
We played power half hour and I got kinda tipsy off like 12 ounces of Corona. Being drunk sucks... I am so glad I never get to that point anymore.
Everyone went to bed early at like 4am but me and J.C. just stood in the kitchen and talked for like 2 hours about everything from relationships to school. It was amazing. He put into perspective all that I over analyze and all that I over think and made me realize alot. I kept telling him how tired and exhausted I am and how much all this traveling, touring, bands, and this lifestyle takes out of me... and he kept telling me how amazing of a photographer I am and I have come to far to give up now... AND HE's 100% RIGHT.
.... he also told me that even if Hit the Lights doesn't use my photos for everything I can't take it personal cause photographers come and go and my friendship with them will last forever... and he kept saying that my photos were there when no one cared who they were or when no one heard of them and it's on the back of there first cd... and he's right. I realized that friendship means more than anything... and I am not letting it go for anything.
Seriously, it was the best conversation I have had with someone in months.
After getting 3 hours of sleep Liz, J.C., and me went to eat at this awesome subway train restaurant that Liz works at... then J.C. went to work and she drove me all the back to Chicago which was SOOOO nice of her. I really liked talking to her and getting to know her alot more. We have been friends for a while but that was probably the most time I spent with her one on one just talking and I loved it.
Ok... enough sappy talk.... here are the photos from last night...
My brother and Milwaukee heart... MIKE TISCHER.
Me and Omar.
Colin and me during power hour.
My girl, Liz, and my Corona.
Me and Dave.
Dave and that amazing 3 speaker boom box and plastic bottle beer.
Me and J.C.
"I lost my pants!!"- Turkey
I striked again. HA. That's what Nick gets for farting on my head and making me puke.
ps- Once again... I LOVE MY LIFE... if you aren't one of my friends and just one of the 165 lurkers I get a day on this thing stop obsessing over my life and go build a snowman.
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: the honorary title
|
December 16th, 2005
04:48 pm - .....You gotta take that step, and your heart, just let it pour out
All the bands left... went back home. I looked around my apartment and got sad but then thought about how I get to spend the next few days with Hit the Lights.
I got to be a merch girl. Which was fun but at the same time it was hard to take photos.
I really love my friends. I know I say this all the time but I love being around my boys. Without Evan or Ryan it kinda felt like something was missing but I got to meet there new drummer, Nate, who stole my ramen, wouldn't let me set him on fire, and everytime he tried to sleep I would make him give me boy advice.
Omar dedicated a song to me and it made me smile sooooo much.
I was upstairs talking to the Rocket Summer most of the night at the Beat Kitchen and they are soooooo nice. We talked about some band called Nickel Creek and and nutrition.
I was looking around at the show and noticed how young people are at these shows now.... It's shocking that 8th graders have cell phones, smoke, and have whatever boobs they think they have pushed up.
I know you know this... but I LOVE MY FRIENDS. .... Some members of the Rocket Summer came over to party/sleepover at my place with me and Hit the Lights.
Seth (Rocket Summer) and the Hit the Lights boys.
Dave and Seth.
Me and Nick.
Me and my Kenosha friend, Jamie.
Me and my new friend, Jedd, looking "surprised."
Me and Nate...he took my lighter cause I told him I was gonna set him on fire.
... and then he stole my ramen I just made.
HA....no caption needed.
ps- Soooo many more on my WEBSITE.
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: the honorary title
|
December 15th, 2005
04:46 am - ..... southern accents are the death of me.....
I had an AMAZING NIGHT.
I woke up with Chasing Victory and Transition here again....Went to Chipotle and then to the Beat Kitchen for there show with Farless and Sullivan.
I can't believe how talented all these bands are and how NICE all of them really are.
I talked alot the guys from Farless and Mark even bought me a drink... even though he complained I picked out expensive stuff.
After the show... party at my place. I smoked ALOT of pot and took tons more photos of all the boys pictured below... (either from SUllivan, Chasing Victory, Transition, or Farless.)
My roommate Mike at his work.
Aww... Farless is cuddling.
Mike and me... I love this photo.
Me and Chris.
Me, Jeremy, and Chris.
Tyson's snowman.
Me and Adam.
Brooks and me. I look so happy in this photo.
Me and Tyson making our "sad" faces.
Me and Jim.
AWW SOOO CUTE!! My roommate Mike and Brooks.
Me and Dan.
Me and Clutch and are "surprised" look... this photo is so amazing.
Mark and me... he totally stole my Corona.
I had such an amazing night. Seriously these bands are the nicest people ever. I can't believe that in a weeks time I connected so much with all of them especially Chasing Victory. It's cute to see them all passed out on my floor... and I am so excited that they invited me to go to California with them in January on tour. I am so ready.
ps- I still can't believe how blessed I am. I truly don't think I deserve to be this happy sometimes and have all these amazing people in my life. I AM SO LUCKY.
Current Mood: HAPPY
Current Music: anberlin
|
December 13th, 2005
05:29 am - ....To your face, you're nothing but my crush that went away
I love my life.
Today I at like noon Chasing Victory and Transition arrived at my apartment. We ordered alot of pizzas, slept, hung out, and then went to see I am the avalanche at the Beat Kitchen. The venue let us all in for free cause we have laminates for the show tomorrow which was so nice of them.
I AM THE AVALANCHE WAS AMAZING.
I seriously love Vinnie. He is one of the best front men I have ever watched on stage besides him being sooooo stoned that he was telling stories about mushrooms and Yoda on stage.
I got to talk to Punchline which is always amazing cause they are the nicest guys ever.
Halifax was good live even though on CD they are horrible.
I got to talk to John Regan and Chris who I haven't saw in forever as well.
After the show.... Marty met us there and just me, Steve, and Matt from Transition went out to eat at Pick Me Up Cafe and had some of the best sandwichs ever and they listened to me talk about all my "boy drama."
We came back and the rest of the guys were mostly passed out.
Cynthia cut my hair and it looks amazing.
Then me and Jeremy sat in my room for about an hour and had "girl talk." I told him all about this boy that is being weird and he told me all about this girl back home. I love hearing guys perspectives on my problems cause they always seem to give me so much better advice than I could come up with for myself. It was such a nice refreshing talk... I totally loved it.
... after hearing Jeremy's advice... Chris came in and gave me totally different advice but once again the talk was totally amazing.
I love how I have only known these Chasing Victory for a week now and I am already this close with them. They are some of the nicest boys I have ever met.
I love how I haven't drank in months cause I can totally see a change in me and see how much happier I am and the friendships I make when alcohol isn't involved.
This day might seem boring to all my LJ fans that read this... but just having a day sitting around, going to a show, and staying up all night talking with friends is AMAZING.
Here we are on the bus on the way to the show.....
Matt, Steve, Jeremy, and me.
Chris, Mike, Mike, and Cynthia.
ps-... and there is something totally else on my mind that I want to talk about that is basically keeping me up at 5:43am but I am taking Chris's advice and swallowing my pride and keeping my mouth shut this time.
pps- I love my life. I can't say it enough. I can't believe I get to live like this. Everynight a different band sleeping over, concerts, touring, photography, friends.... everything is such a blessing to me.
ppps- I LOVE LINDSEY. I am so blessed to have a friend as amazing as her even when she lives in California... if it wasn't for her I wouldn't have made it through tonight. BABE... I LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER UNDERSTAND.
Current Mood: confused
Current Music: halifax
|
December 12th, 2005
05:48 am - .... another reason I LOVE OHIO!
I love Every Bridge Burned.
My sleepovers with them are sooo much fun.
We were all up until like 6am and look at why.....
... some I can't even begin to think of captions for....
um... I don't know why they had a dirt devil in use.
I found it humorous Geoff had a Chiodos shirt on.
Me and Otis.
Yes that's mustard... that Otis did lick off him.
Funniest game of Twister ever.
DOn't ask.
Mac and cheese anyone?
Yep... still don't ask.
Current Mood: happy
Current Music: every bridge burned
|
December 7th, 2005
09:35 pm - ...... i am so homesick
I do this journal for me... whether you think I do it for attention or to "say things in here so that certain person reads it..." you apparently don't know me cause I never scared to open my mouth to anyone.
Notice how all my entries are usually at 3 or 4am? That's because in the middle of the night when I start panicking this is all I have.
I don't like how I have been crying to much. The littlest things set me off and I just break down into tears. Tonight I saw a photo of Mike on his myspace that he took straight from my LJ. It made me get the worst pit in my stomach. I don't know why I was so shocked he read it but Lindsey is right when she said, "Of course he read it you put it in your away messages and myspace posts." It's just this is an expression of me. This journal is the most honest thing I have. I shouldn't be surprised people read this anyway... this is the internet.
My roommate, Mike Kish, tonight told me that Chasing Victory wants to take me on tour to California and Las Vegas in January. I am so there and so flattered that after just spending a few days with me they like me this much. It's so flattering but seriously those kids are amazing.
I have been thinking way to much about my career lately. I have been obsessing over my photos, website, touring, concerts, and everything that has to do with my photography like crazy. I want this so bad. I NEED THIS. I don't care if I am always gonna be broke, or going from tour van to tour van, or state to state... I WANT THIS MORE THAN I HAVE EVER WANTED ANYTHING ELSE.
Coran called me last week and got me all excited about his band, Sayonara Toger, was coming to Chicago... then he told me today they cancelled. I am sooo dissappointed!
I feel so fat it's grossing me out to even get out of bed cause I don't even want strangers to see me like this.
This is my last night in Florida. I am so ready to go home. I had such an amazing time I just want to sleep in my own bed.
When my plane lands this is my schedule....
Thursday night, plane lands: Dinner with Marty and Mica.
Friday: work 10 to 4pm. Shooting Action Action and hanging out with Brian (my friend who use to be in Roses are Red is in town with Aerosmith)
Saturday: work 10 to 4pm. Every Bridge Burned (my friends from Ohio) show and sleepover.
Sunday: work 10 to 4pm. Train ride 3 hours to Peoria to see Matt (my friend in this band the Forecast) or shooting the Hawthorne Heights show.
Mon and Tues: WORK DOUBLES!! and Chasing Victory and Sullivan are sleeping over.
Wednesday: Chasing Victory, Sullivan, and Transition show and sleepover party.
Thurs and Fri: HIT THE LIGHTS!! In Chicago and Milwaukee shows and sleepovers!
... I can't believe HOW LONG THIS WILL ALL BE! ... but I WILL LOVE IT!
I LOVE MY LIFE. I might complain sometimes and talk about my panic attacks, but it's those moments in my life that make me realize how blessed I am to have all the other moments with my friends.
ps- I just met someone this week.... yep. He's pretty amazing.
Current Mood: home sick
Current Music: new found glory
|
December 6th, 2005
10:46 pm - ... florida is actually making me smile
My daddy made me go to Universal Studios yesterday with my family. I would rather have gone to see Chasing Victory, Transition, and Sullivan again in Tampa but I could tell that my daddy really wanted me there. I love spending so much time with him on this trip no matter what we do. I love him so much and I am way to lucky to have a daddy like him.
After riding all of the lamest rides of my life... 9 members of my family and me went to eat at Jimmy Buffet's Margaritaville. I couldn't eat and just ordered water. I had to sidekick the whole time and text Lindsey and Tiffany and talk to Mike and Derrick on aim to keep my mind off how much I didn't want to be there. I started to have a panic attack and actually started to tear. I felt sick. I felt like I was gonna pass out. I don't know why I got that way but it's been happening alot lately and I hate that this is all coming back to me again.
I punched my sister in the face last night and it felt AMAZING. She got upset at my friends for leaving out a cookie rapper and jumped on me and pulled her hair because I said, "Well at least I have friends to invite over." I looked at her and hit her right in the mouth. She cried and I laughed cause I thought it was so funny that the only reason she got so upset at my comment is because SHE KNOWS IT'S TRUE. I don't know if a punch could ever feel so good.
After that, Chasing Victory came back over with my roommate Mike Kish, for a fun sleepover. I bought them frozen pizzas, apple joice, and Dr. Pepper and we stayed up until 4am taking photos of them cuddling with eachother.....
Jeremy, Mike, and Mike.
Mike and Chris.
ps- Glenn called me tonight cause he's coming back home to Orlando. His band, Mashlin, is playing at the Social tomorrow night here, so we are going to get dinner and go to the show.
I LOVE MY LIFE. .......... this week just keeps getting better and better. I made new friends in Chasing Victory and SUllivan and got to hang out with Transition again. I love the way Transition totally remembered my name and who I was from over a year ago. I get to hang out with Glenn tomorrow and all the time this week with my daddy... seriously I LOVE MY LIFE.
Current Mood: ![[mood icon]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/mood/moonsis/silly.gif) giddy
Current Music: i am watching sex and the city
|
December 4th, 2005
02:16 pm - ....there's a bitter cold chill in the air.....
I slept in today until noon cause my ears have been ringing since the plane landed, I can't stop coughing, sneezing, or having a migraine. I took so much airborne, nyquil, and dayquil that my stomach is hurting now too. However, I LOVE to get away. I love to step out of my daily life cause it helps me reflect on all the things that make me happy and unhappy. It helps me see all the things that I either I am too clouded to see or that I think too much of.
Tonight my roommate, Mike Kish, is in Orlando cause he is on tour with this band called Chasing Victory and doing merch for them. I am going to there show here tonight to photograph them and then we are having a sleepover at my condo.
I can tell my sister is upset that I am not going to Pleasure Island with her tonight like originally planned. I haven't drank since October 23rd and I want to spend time with her but not at a place where all you do is drink. I love her, I really do, but I need to photograph as much as I can.
There are so many photographers out there that I need to do ALL I can to set myself apart. I need this. I love this. No one understands how much I want this. They don't understand how I spend so many nights shooting, kissing ass to people I can't stand, open my home to any band I can, stay up all night scanning negatives and processing film. This is my life... and this is one of the most important things I need from it.
I have been watching America's Top Next Model for about 4 hours now. I actually LOVE it.
Here are some photos from the trip so far....
The night before in the suburbs.... Yes, my dad is better than yours.
Starting my trip off right... right off the plane at the airport.
On the shuttle bus on the way to get the rental car.
At the Al Capone's dinner show with my sister and her boyfriend.
Current Mood: sick yet excited
Current Music: no music...america's top next model
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
little_furies's journal